How to get over a break up may not be easy.There are several reasons why people breakup and even when others think it is for the best, the impact of a breakup can be devastating. Many questions keep pondering your mind and you simply cannot come up with answers.
Keep in mind that getting over a breakup does not necessarily mean that you and your ex may never see eye-to-eye. First of all before you understand how to get over a break up, it is important to understand why it happens at the first place . There are many reasons for a breakup. It may mean you were never meant to be or it is simply a wake up call for the two of you so you stop taking things for granted.Getting over a breakup is simply addressing the pain that the breakup caused. The following are ways to get over a breakup.
12 ways to get over a break up
1. Think through why you broke up but do not obsess about it
This phase is all about relating to the reasons the relationship got on the rocks and why it got to the point of breaking up. This may not bring about anything good but it will help you identify what led to the predicament.It becomes a good thing if you identify the problem and prevent it from happening again. This may save your relationship in the event that you find yourselves back together. Alternatively, it will help you realize that either of you deserves better thus acting as a wake up call to the two of you. However, ensure that you do not obsess over these reasons and make it a blame game.
2. Keep your space
If you are looking to learn how to get over a breakup fast, the best thing would be to keep your distance from your ex after the breakup. Even if you decide to remain as friends, well, you need some time to come to terms to the situation. During this time, avoid coming into contact with each other physically and even avoid each others families and any other ties you shared.
This prevents complicating this further than it should. Once you clear your mind of the entire situation and you are still cool with the decision on becoming friends still sounds okay, then you can do so after the healing process is complete. The time duration for this differs amongst people so it is best you take your time.
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3. Avoid thinking about the relationship
Even when two people have broken up, it becomes inevitable to block out the good moments. These moments were good while they lasted but they will give you a problem when it comes to getting over a breakup. This is not how to get over a breakup.
As much as you would want the relationship to go on, this is not the path to take as it will be tormenting you. Sometimes, it is best that you accept the decision at that moment and try to remain calm if you are really serious to learn how to get over a breakup. If it was meant to be, you will find your way back together but if it was not, it is better now than waiting for later.
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4. Do not skip the hate phase
After a breakup, you get hurt and angry at the same time and just want to let it out. At this time, do not pretend that what is happening is okay. It will eat you inside and you will not be able to deal with the breakup . At this stage, you have so much negative energy but you can get rid of it without having to hurt yourself further.
Whatever you need to do to get the anger out, go ahead as long as you are not looking to hurt another person. Some individuals go on a revenge spree and get themselves into bigger trouble. This is not how to get over a breakup. Healthier ways include crying to let the tension go.
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5. Socialize more often
One way of getting over a breakup includes going out and talking to friends. Well, a problem shared is half solved and you are encouraged to talk to friends. You need to be very picky over who you choose to talk to. You should be looking to talk to people who love you and will listen and help you feel better. The support you get is the reason you will gradually get over your breakup.
In some instances, talking to friends may help you realize if the breakup was worth it or they will help you realize that there is something in the relationship that could be salvaged. For a wake up call, talking to friends will help you realize it from an open perspective. During this time, you are probably mad and the last thing you want is to think that you will ever see your partner again. You are driven by the pain and not by proper reasoning. Hearing it from a third party maybe what you need.
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6. Get rid of memory triggers.
During a relationship, there are a number of items that bring partners together. These are the things you see or hear that remind you of each other. These are the items that revive your memories whether good or bad.
If you are really serious to learn how to get over a breakup, it is best that you get rid of these items if you are going to erase the memories of your partner. Though it is a gradual process, getting rid of memory triggers boosts the process and speeds up the recovery process.
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There is a key difference between tearing up photos of the two of you and burning them and putting them away where you will not come across them. Burning them will only get them out of sight but they are definitely in your mind. Get rid of these memories in a calm manner. It becomes simpler to calm down and let go without the triggers as opposed to when they are still around you. Again, if you end up back together, you can simply bring them out from the closet or the dark corner bringing in circumstances that a misunderstanding caused the breakup.
7. Lean towards something you love doing
It is a great idea to divert your line of thought. Though it may sound difficult, you can try doing other activities that are a favorite to you. There are a number of aspects that comprise your life and all you need do is concentrate on another hobby or look at your to-do-list and complete it.
Whatever you pick, you will not concentrate on the breakup and you will find something to divert your energy towards so you can keep running your life. This will help you to find happiness and reason to keep pushing without feeling like you lost it all.
8. Lead an active lifestyle
Leading an active lifestyle will divert your attention. In an effort to do this, you can try exercising. Choose what you like to do or what you do best even when you are not a sporty person. Even talking a walk is a good idea. As you walk around, you will begin to notice things that you probably have not yet they were right there.
How to get over a break up require a lot of time , don’t just think it will happen over night. If you are a sporty person, jogging, running, cycling or even swimming would be a great idea. These activities can be relaxing if done wholeheartedly. You get to address your state of feeling and at the same time you better your physical health.
9. Let it go
After a breakup, individuals indulge so much in self-pity and worry. These are the times when you need to let go. It is better said than done but think of it as a test. If it was truly yours, it will be right back. Also, no one can deny you what is yours. Let go and if it comes back, it is yours to keep and enjoy. You never know what is in store for you and by holding on to what has already happened you may never see what you need to.
10. It is okay to cry
As much as you want to look strong, you will be glad to know that you can cry it out all night if you want to. It also helps to relieve all the negative energy through the right channel rather than opting to revenge or do something dangerous. However, you should not prolong it to every day of the week.
11. Put the pain on paper
Writing stuff down can work a great deal into dealing with a broken relationship. Writing on paper should however not mean that you are writing mean things to send to your ex. Writing will help to release the tension and the heavy heart rather than walking around holding on to so much pain. Put it on paper and then you can throw it out. You do not have to involve anyone else in this process.
12. Symbolize the breakup
Just like you may have stuff that symbolize the good times in the relationship, you can also take your time and do something to indicate that that the relationship is over. It makes you feel like you called the last shot and eventually makes you feel better about yourself.
13. Stop talking about it all the time
One of the best to know how to get over a break up is to stop talking about it. It becomes a major problem when you cannot stop talking about the breakup. When you find yourself talking about nothing but the breakup and how it hurt you, there is a definite concern. If you are looking on how to get over the breakup, you need to stop talking about it and move on. The only thing this does is that it helps you to cling to the past. Letting go becomes a fight that you may probably never win.
14. Hold on to your dignity
After a breakup, many do not care what they do and they go hysterical. Sometimes, the relationship did not go wrong because it was your fault. You do not have to lose your self-worth over it. Hold on to your dignity and realize that there is much more to live for.Your self-confidence and self-esteem should not be altered. People makes mistakes and this is no reason to look down upon yourself.
Video tips On How to get over a breakup
People breakup for different reason and while some agree that it is of great benefit to both parties, it is not the same in all relationships. It gets difficult to get over a relationship that you worked to bring together. Sometimes, it is simply difficult to let go.
However, the above tips can help you to learn how to get over a break up and the tips act as a guideline to help you get over your breakup while at the same time staying open to the hope that there is room to build it even further. In this, there are no decisions that should be made in the attempt to hurt your ex.
Try the above ways that will not jeopardize the chances that you may still get back into each other’s arms without keeping your partner constantly in your mind. No matter the turn of events, you are likely to be at the top of your games in no time.Just remember how to get over a break up wouldn’t happen overnight.