How to win your ex back fast can be very difficult. When your significant other ends things, it can be a very upsetting. Just when you thought that things were good, they end things.
When this happens, most people are not ready to let it end there. If your ex has ended things, and you want to win them back, you need to go about it the right way. If not, the chances of you getting them back are not very good. If you want to know how to win your ex back, you should try to avoid these steps below
What to Avoid When Trying to Learn How to get your ex back
1. Avoid Disastrous Mistakes
When you have your heart broken, you will usually do just about anything to get things back to the way they were when things between the two of you were good. Because you are so desperate, you are likely to make mistakes that you cannot come back from.
2. Constantly Calling and Texting
One of the most common mistakes that people make after they are dumped, is calling or texting their ex constantly.
You may think that if your ex does not hear from you, they will forget you. When you constantly call or text, all you are showing your ex is that you are needy, clingy, and that you are miserable without them. This can be very unattractive, and can only push your ex further away.If you are trying to know how to win your ex back avoid constantly calling and texting.
Even if you try to make your conversation sound friendly, your ex will likely see through the act. When you go out drinking with friends, leave your phone at home or have a friend hold it. The worst time to call your ex is after you have had a few drinks.
3. Trying to Get Pity or Begging
Begging your ex to reconsider and take you back is a huge mistake. It will only make you look insecure and weak. These are not attractive qualities by any means. You also want to avoid trying to get them to pity you.
If you tell them that you cannot live without them, or use tricks and lies to get them to pity you, it can seriously backfire. Most people will not take someone back simply because they feel bad. If your ex does take you back due to your pity act, it won’t last. As soon as they no longer feel bad for you, they will break your heart again.Therefore you shouldn’t beg if you want to know how to win your ex back.
4. Your Ex’s Doormat:
When your ex leaves you, your first instinct will be to do whatever it takes to win your ex back. This can mean that you need to give up your hopes, dreams, desires, and abandon your goals and plans for the future. When you show your ex that you will give up anything that they ask, and do anything that they ask, they will likely lose all of their respect for you. If this happens, you will have pushed them further away than they were before.
5. Being Too Affectionate:
If your ex leaves you, one of the biggest mistakes that you can make is being overly loving and affectionate. They already know that you love them. All this will do is make them feel trapped and suffocated.Flipping Out When Your Ex Starts Dating: As soon as you hear the rumor that your ex has made a date with someone else, it can send you into a panic.
You may be thinking that your ex is going to fall in love with their date, get married, have kids, and live happily ever after. Considering your ex just met this person, you are likely seriously overreacting.If you stop, and think rationally about the situation, you will realize that this person that they are dating is simply a rebound.
Rebound relationships help to get over a breakup. Often times, however, rebound relationships do not work out. This is something that you need to keep in mind before you flip out about your ex’s upcoming date.
Read now : How to get back with your ex fast ?
How to Win Your Ex Back- Recommended Steps You Should Take
Not that you know all of the mistakes that you should avoid, it is important that you follow the few steps. These steps below can increase your chances to get your ex back .
Step 1-No Contact
As difficult as is may be, you need to stop all communication with your ex for a short period of time. You may believe in the concept “out of sight, out of mind”, however, when you cease contact for a while, they will miss you.
The lack of contact will give your ex a chance to remove the negative associations of your breakup from their minds, and they may start remembering the good things again. When you do not make contact, they will see you more as independent rather than needy.
Another reason that the no contract rule is good, is so that you can find time for yourself. When you are not worrying about contacting your ex, you can take a rational look at your relationship to see if it is worth fighting to try to get it back. You also need to prove to yourself that you can be happy even if you are alone. This will make you feel more independent, rather than needy.
Finally, the no contact period will give you a chance to take positive changes in your life. These changes will make you an overall happier person. When you finally do see your ex, they will notice your new found happiness, and will find you more attractive.
Ground Rules For the “No Contact” Period
How to win your ex back with the no contact rule is simple. When it comes to the no contact rule period, there are a few things that you should follow. No contact means more than just face to face contact. No contact also includes:
- No calling
- No texting
- No online contact (Facebook, Twitter, IM, etc)
- No hanging out with mutual friends hoping that you will be meeting up with your ex
- No “accidentally” bumping into your ex.
The no contact rule period should last until you have had a chance to pull it together, and you are no longer an emotional mess. You should wait until you have made some positive changes with yourself which give you more happiness and confidence.
If your ex tries to contact you during the “not contact rule” period, do not respond. This will only set you back. You do not need to worry, if they tried to contact you once, they will respond when you are ready to contact them. In the meantime, just relax, they will not get married and have children with someone else during the 30 day period..
Step 2-What To Do During the “No Contact rule ” Period to win your ex back
It is important to be productive during the “no contact rule” period. You do not want to spend the 30 days, alone in your house, crying. There are a few things that you can do to use the time effectively.
- Make Positive Changes in Your Appearance:
Making positive changes in your appearance will make you look better and feel more confident.This will impress your ex when you first see them after the no contact period is over.You can consider, getting a haircut, having your teeth cleaned, getting to the gym, and buying a new outfit. You want to avoid making any drastic, lifelong changes, like plastic surgery or getting a tattoo with your ex’s name.
- Make Positive Changes in Your Mentality:
If you change your mental state for the better, you ex will notice it when the two of you finally meet up.You can try going out with friends, writing in a journal, or simply giving yourself time to grieve. You can even consider going out on a date. It doesn’t need to lead anywhere, but it will give you a fun night out, and can be a great confidence booster.
- Making Contact with Your Ex
When you think that you have improved your mental state, physical appearance, and you can finally speak to your ex without breaking down, it is time to make contact.
Even if you feel this way before the 30 day “no contact rule” period is up, you should still wait the full 30 days. You should also wait until you have accepted the breakup, just in case your ex does not want to get back together. Finally, you should be absolutely sure that getting your ex back is the best thing for you. Once all these things are done, you can contact your ex. There are a few ways that you can do so.
- Handwritten letter:
A handwritten letter is a good way to make the first contact with your ex. In the letter, you can apologize for any bad behavior that led to the breakup, or after. You can also let them know what you have been doing in the past month, and the positive changes that you have made.
- Text Message:
You can send a text message to your ex. You should not start with something like “hi”. You should also avoid telling them how much you still love them and miss them. Your first text should be something of substance, where your ex will want to answer you back. After a few text exchanges, you can ask your ex to meet you in order to catch up.
- Phone Call:
If you decide to use a phone call for your first form of contact, you should tell your ex that you are just calling to say hello, and catch up a little. Before you hang up, invite your ex to a friendly lunch.
Final Steps to learn how to win your ex back
The Date : When you have a meeting set up between you and your ex, you want them to see you as attractive, fun, happy, and confident. Avoid talking about your breakup when you first sit down. Talk about the fun things that you have done during your time apart. You should also reminisce about the good times that you had with your ex. If all goes well, your ex will want you back. This is how to win your ex back!